Men's 1s vs South Saxons M2

It was a decent day at Hastings concrete beach. Our leader, Josh, was absent again. I think he was getting married for the second time this season. Anyway, let’s hope this one works out and he’ll be back again next week.

Hailsham were dominant in the first part of the game. Dave was blistering down the right hand side as usual and the defence played round the back superbly, waiting for a gap to appear so we could exploit the Saxons defence. 

The opening goal came after several short corners, this one was won by Dave I think (get in there, fantasy points flying). Before the game, we’d agreed that drag flicks probably weren’t going to work across the pebbles of the beach. However, Connor told the team he had a “feeling” it would work. We’re very spiritual in the men’s 1’s, so we went with the drag flick. The keeper made a good save from the flick and the defender decided Kieran was looking a bit lonely at the top of the D. As a kind gesture, he passed him the ball for some company. Kieran swept the ball into the bottom right hand corner to make it 1-0. 

That last description took me some time, and the use of a thesaurus, so gonna keep this next part concise.

Second half now, Hailsham were rampant again. Kieran won the short corner on the left hand side. By this point, we’d agreed to let someone have a go from the top of the D, no messing, just hit it. Humber stepped up and smashed it onto the back board. There were some protests that the ball was above the back board when it crossed the line, now I’m no physician, but thats a load of (INSERT SUITABLE EXPLETIVE) 

Anyway, you wouldn’t believe this if it wasn’t in writing. Sam Rham managed to get some points on fantasy for an assist. I’m sure his 3% ownership will sky rocket after today. Before talking about the goal, I’ll briefly discuss Rham. He played a beautiful pass to Bailey (one he actually controlled). It was almost like a skimming stone across the pitch. Excellent. Then, we were brought back to reality. From a free hit within the Saxons half, Sam has smashed the ball (chest height) at Connor (which he impressively controlled). Sam said he did this “so it wasn’t intercepted”. The Rham we know and love had returned.

Rham then made a more sensible pass (bit bobbly but better than chest height) through to Dave. Somehow, the ball ended up in the air. And for those who don’t know, this is Dave’s bread and butter. Quick Cack-handed volley into the bottom left hand corner, more fantasy points, 3-0.

4th hailsham goal (simplified): Stunning. Saxons dispossessed in their own half, Connor -> Dave -> Kieran -> goal. Lampard esque run into the zone of terror. Open goal. Lovely team goal. 

Saxons scored next. Bored now. 

In summary, hailsham = pretty decent. Well deserved with bare 11. Shout out to everyone who played for staying on and avoiding injuries, especially with balls flying at chest height. Up the Sham.